A peace like no other

"Humble yourselves, therefore under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be self controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:6-8

Right now, I am feeling overwhelmed. Not only do we have a diabetic 3 year old, but I also have a 17 year old that is finishing applying to colleges. She wants my help to write one last essay. I also have a six year old that wasn't quite ready for first grade this year, so I decided to homeschool her to give her time to catch up and get solid ready for 1st grade next year. then our 3 year old diabetic also has a 3 year old twin brother that needs care and attention. And...a 15 month old baby! Our baby was the one that used to get all the scheduling and naps and food routines. Now he is in the background as our daughter needs more scheduling, more food routines and shots.

How am I to do all of this? I took this scripture from my Bible study I am working on. Prior to this scripture, the study said to cast all of your duties on God and let him help show you the priorities. I feel all of these are priorities. I'm not talking about mopping. I've already decided cleaning, and meal plans were not as important this week as just getting everyone through the day. what am I to do?

We are limited on income as I stopped teaching several years ago to be home with the kids. So I don't know how we would pay for the school I want my daughter to attend or preschool for a few mornings a week for the twins. The twins are ready for preschool. I know they would love it. But how could we afford it right now? This is why I'm homeschooling. But now I feel to drained to do it all anymore.

Just six months ago, we were running shorter and shorter financially and really struggled just to put gas in the car, buy groceries. When our refrigerator broke, that was my darkest moment. A puddle of dirty water on the floor, our treasured food thawing, and no means to fix it.

The Lord carried us through this. Months later, we received a windfall that I had always been ficticously joking about. An aunt of my husband's that I had never met, left us some money.

wow.

we had exited the desert.

we paid our property taxes, and past due bills. we even treated ourselves to the new windows we wanted for our daughter in her bedroom.

God knew what was to come. He had made me stronger while in that desert. I began to treasure everything I had and really thought about money before I spent it. my priorities shifted. my goal is to continue to move forward and eventually be debt free.

I also learned that God can do the impossible. He does carry us when we can't walk and he always has a plan. He knew that money was coming. He prepared our hearts to be wise when it came. He also helped me get my home in order with my study and mentor knowing that my daughter's diagnosis was coming.

God is faithful. If I have learned nothing, I know God is faithful. He does love us and care about us. His plans are for us to prosper. to give us peace.

we will have trials and stress. But we must give them to him to sort out for us.

with that, I lay my burdens at his feet and ask for him to answer prayer and direct us and continue to keep us safe and guarded and healthy. and thank him for bringing to light my daughter's disease in perfect timing.

I feel cleared now. not so overwhelmed. just like a ceo. lots of responsibility. I need minute reminders. God twitters. who is in control. As I said earlier regarding my dad. he was my rock and the first to say that our time here is so short. and now he is gone. I encouraged him to live every minute even with puminary fibrosis. he would require no less of me.

I humbly hand everything back over. thanks for the reminder.

in honor of my dad. he never complained as he suffered. I pray for the same peace.

"humble yourselves, therefore under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time."
1 peter 5:6